The Lazy Girls Halloween Costume Guide

It’s nearly a week away and it’s time crack out the Halloween costumes.
You could buy an overpriced ready made outfit from one of those pop up
halloween costume shops that shows up every year, “Pirate Captain”
anyone? Seriously though you don’t have to spend a ton or really have to
be super crafty to pull together a kick ass Halloween look. All you
need is your own wardrobe and some creative accessioning, here’s my lazy girls guide to Halloween.

Mary Poppins

Who: The quintessential English Nanny who is practically perfect in every way.

you’ll need: A good button down shirt with a long black skirt and
you’re already half way there. Pair with some pointed lace up boots and a bag that looks like it is 100% bigger on the inside.

Finishing touches: A bowler hat with some flowers from the poundshop and a wee spot of red ribbon are all you need to complete this look. Parrot umbrella optional but preferred (yes, I’m still hunting one down.) 

Rosie The Riveter

FOR SHAME. Rosie is a god damn cultural icon, used to represent the
female factory workers who kept the planes and other machinery in check
during world war II. 

What you need: This
is perhaps the simplest low budget look you can crack out without
dawning the boxers and going all Risky Business. So dust out your old
canadian tuxedo, a red bandana and a can do attitude and you’ve got one
of the most recognisable icons of the 40s. 

Finishing touches: A good flex and some lippy. SORTED. 

Creepy Doll

Who: Straight up from your childhood nightmares (and let’s face it, a good few of your adult ones too.) 

you’ll need:  For  this you’re going to have to do a little bit of
prep. Put your hair in to some tight curls (or some damp plaits
overnight brushed and backcombed out should work just as well.) The
actual outfit is pretty simple, any dress with a peter pan collar, pop
socks and mary jane shoes or plimsolls. 

touches:  Ribbons and bows for your hair, a wee bit of handywork with
fake eyelashes and white eyeliner and big circles of blush. Finish off
with the perfect cupid bows pout or if you are feeling a bit more creative, perhaps a dislocated jaw is your look of choice?

Dana Scully

Who: Our first lady of skepticism herself. 

What you’ll need: For this you are ALL about the power dressing. A matching blac suit, a button up and a large trench. Scully’s sleek bob is mandatory, with a little bit of backcombing at the roots to get that special 90s lift.

Finishing touches: Mock yourself up a wee FBI badge

Tina Belcher

Who: The hero we both need and deserve, the eldest of the Belcher clan is a god damn inspiration, even if she does put her bra on one boob at a time like anyone else. Time for this charm bomb to explode.

What you’ll need: A light blue tee paired with a darker blue skirt is the basis for channeling your inner Tina. You’ll want to crack out some black square glasses, you’re black cons and black and red sports socks. Perfect.

Finishing touches: Yellow barrettes and your favourite erotic friend fiction.

 I don’t know about you, but I could pretty much create every single one of these looks right off the bat without too much bother, so if you find yourself skint, heading to a last minute party or just really aren’t that crafty (I hear ya sister) any of these guys should stand you in good stead or Halloween, and no sticky back plastic in sight!

What costume will you be rocking this season?


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